1 Samuel 25:36
“Now Abigail went to Nabal, and there he was, holding a feast in his house, like the feast of a king. And Nabal’s heart was merry within him, for he was very drunk; therefore she told him nothing, little or much, until morning light.”

In part (1) of this topic, “How to get people to listen,” we showed that people don’t just listen to anyone but listen to people they respect. We connected respect and people’s willingness to listen to what we say.

In part (2), we look at another key to helping people listen to us. We are looking at the issue of TIMING. When we speak is just as important as what we say. Timing makes a world of difference whether people listen to us or not.

Speaking truth is good, but speaking truth in the right way and at the right time is best. Let’s go beyond what is good to what is excellent. Let’s not settle for only speaking what we believe is correct. Let’s help people listen.

Abigail wanted her husband to know what she had done and how she had prevented death from coming to his entire household. But when she saw him drunk, she decided it was not the right time. She decided to tell him nothing “until morning light.”

No matter how much pressure you feel to say something, and no matter how urgent you think your message is, look for the right time to say it. The purpose of communication is not just information sharing. It’s creating understanding.

Some people feel they must speak their mind always, irrespective of timing, and then they are surprised they are often misunderstood, their ideas or their persons are rejected, or they always enter into conflict with others. Timing matters.

If Abigail had spoken to Nabal that night while he was drunk, he might have become violent towards her for making those decisions without his permission. Or, in his drunken state, he may not have understood the weight of what had happened.

As pilgrims, we need the virtue of self-control to know when to speak. We need heavenly wisdom to know how to speak. Even if people don’t accept our ideas, let’s present them at such a time as they can at least listen to it. Amen.